


Hopes, Dreams, and the Armageddon

by flyingtortoisetoes



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gen, Humanstuck, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Mentions of Suicide, Past Relationship(s), Trollian (Homestuck)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-20
Updated: 2020-07-20
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:42:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25410097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flyingtortoisetoes/pseuds/flyingtortoisetoes
Summary: AA: im n0t sure id c0nsider death depressingAA: its inevitableAA: death is the 0nly certainty y0u and i and every0ne else f0r that matter will ever kn0wIn which Sollux Captor finds a Trollian handle amid some ominous graffiti.
Relationships: Sollux Captor & Aradia Megido
Kudos: 8





	Hopes, Dreams, and the Armageddon

**Author's Note:**

> quote from the iliad
> 
> tw: mentions of suicide

twinArmageddons [TA] began trolling apocalypseArisen [AA]

  
TA: “everythiing ii2 more beautiiful becau2e we are doomed.  
TA: you wiill never be loveliier than you are now.  
TA: we wiill never be here again.”  
TA: homer, huh?  
AA: d0 i kn0w y0u  
TA: not iin the 2liighte2t.  
AA: 0h  
AA: d0 y0u kn0w me  
TA: no.  
AA: f0rgive me if im a bit c0nfused  
AA: but wh0 are y0u  
TA: ii wa2 checkiing out the graffiitii downtown and ii 2aw that quote it really 2tuck wiith me.  
TA: your trolliian wa2 tagged beneath iit 2o ii a22umed you were the one re2pon2iible.  
AA: 0h yes  
AA: that was me  
AA: id nearly f0rg0tten ab0ut that 0ne  
AA: i d0nt really d0 that s0rt 0f thing much anym0re  
TA: you mean graffiitiing 2omewhat omiinou2 yet beautiiful me22age2 about the tran2iitoriine22 of liife a2 we know iit?  
AA: precisely  
AA: it used t0 be a h0bby 0f mine  
AA: alth0ugh i must admit ive never actually had s0meb0dy c0ntact me after seeing 0ne 0f my pr0jects  
TA: well iim glad two have made an iintere2tiing fiir2t iimpre22iion.  
TA: iim 2ollux captor.  
AA: aradia megid0  
TA: well aradiia megiido  
TA: what do you do when you arent creatiing vii2ual commentary on mortaliity?  
AA: im a m0rtician  
TA: je2u2.  
AA: well i supp0se i sh0uld clarify  
AA: im still in my apprenticeship  
TA: youve got some thiing for the depre22ing and the macabre, then?  
AA: im n0t sure id c0nsider death depressing  
AA: ts inevitable  
AA: death is the 0nly certainty y0u and i and every0ne else f0r that matter will ever kn0w  
AA: s0 if y0u ask me id say thats pretty c0mf0rting  
TA: ...  
TA: uh  
TA: well then, have you got any iintere2t2?  
TA: other hobbie2 maybe, 2iince you 2aiid you dont really graffiitii anymore?  
AA: 0h sure  
AA: archae0l0gy has always been a passi0n 0f mine  
TA: oh that2 actually pretty cool.  
TA: 2ee, now were gettiing 2omewhere.  
TA: what el2e?  
AA: well  
AA: hm  
AA: ive always f0und 0uija t0 be quite interesting  
TA: are you alway2 thii2 hyper focu2ed on the doom and gloom liife ha2 two offer?  
TA: ii mean, not that iim judgiing or anythiing  
TA: but you are a biit of a drag two talk two  
AA: y0u did text me first y0u kn0w  
TA: ii didnt mean that iin nece22ariily a bad way!  
TA: ii ju2t meant youve got a lot of 2pooky thiing2 two 2ay, that2 all.  
AA: well since y0ure s0 c0ncerned with what im d0ing  
AA: what kind 0f things are y0u interested in  
AA: y0u kn0w  
AA: besides hunting d0wn the creat0rs 0ut 0min0us graffiti  
TA: eheheh 2o 2he doe2 have a 2en2e of humor.  
AA: i have my m0ments  
TA: well 2iince you a2ked, iim a computer techniical 2upport 2peciialii2t.  
AA: s0 y0ure g00d with c0mputers then  
TA: iim pretty good at programmiing ii gue22.  
TA: iid liike to 2ay hackiing ii2 my 2peciialty, but even though ii am ape2hiit fuckiing banana2 wiith computer2, 2ometiime2 ii dont think iim a2 good a2 ii am.  
TA: but whatever, enough about all that.  
TA: iive got a que2tiion for you.  
TA: iive kiinda been thiinking iit over 2ince even before ii 2aw your art.  
TA: and, well,  
TA: ii gue22 you could 2ay 2eeing that quote wa2 liike a 2iign, iif you beliieve in that 2ort of thiing.  
AA: whats the questi0n?  
TA: iim rambliing, arent ii?  
AA: 0_0  
TA: riight.  
TA: do you...  
TA: hm  
TA: aradiia, do you ever feel liike everythiing you do is doomed before you even begiin?  
TA: ii mean, 2hiit, 2orry to lay that on you liike that and all, but ii ju2t can’t 2top feeliing that way.  
TA: god.  
TA: you know what, thii2 wa2 a bad iidea.  
TA: ii shouldnt have bothered you.  
TA: iit wa2 niice two meet you, aradiia.  
TA: 2orry.  
AA: s0llux  
AA: wait  
TA: ...  
AA: are y0u happy  
TA: 2ure.  
AA: really  
AA: think ab0ut it and answer again  
TA: iim not 2ure what you mean.  
AA: what im trying t0 say is  
AA: if y0u died right n0w  
AA: w0uld y0u l00k back 0n y0ur life and be satisfied  
TA: that2 2ort of a heavy que2tiion.  
AA: and y0urs wasnt  
TA: touche.  
AA: s0  
AA: whats y0ur answer  
TA: no, ii wouldnt be 2atii2fiied.  
TA: but ii already knew that, that2 kiind of the whole point.  
AA: are y0u afraid 0f dying  
TA: the fuck?  
TA: well yeah, who ii2nt?  
AA: im n0t  
TA: riight.  
TA: almo2t forgot who ii wa2 talkiing two for a 2econd there.  
AA: d0 y0u want my advice 0r n0t  
TA: youre riight.  
TA: iim 2orry.  
TA: iit2 ju2t ii feel liike nothiing ever goe2 my way no matter what ii do.  
TA: everythiing alway2 work2 out ju2t fiine for anyone el2e, but ii can never catch a break.  
AA: y0u kn0w f0r all my d00msaying i really truly believe everything has a purp0se  
AA: sure i believe it in a rather fatalistic way  
AA: but i think thats a start  
TA: 2ee, iim not even fatalii2tiic, iim ju2t a 2tone cold niihilii2t.  
TA: ii cant 2ee meaniing anywhere ii go, no matter how hard ii try.  
TA: you 2aiid iit your2elf, death ii2 a certaiinty.  
TA: 2o iif were all gonna diie anyway2, why 2hould ii have two work hard all my liife and 2earch for a meaniing that may or may not exii2t ju2t two have iit all ripped out from under me when ii diie??  
AA: i d0nt kn0w a wh0le l0t ab0ut that  
AA: n0b0dy can say for sure what happens when we die  
AA: i think that h0pe is a really imp0rtant thing to have  
TA: how?  
TA: how can ii be hopeful when my entiire exii2tance ii2 doomed from the 2tart?  
AA: when y0u put it that way isnt every0nes existence d00med fr0m the start  
AA: try to find c0mf0rt in kn0wing that y0u arent al0ne  
AA: even if it may feel like y0u are  
TA: reliigiion ii2 bull2hiit.  
AA: 0_0  
TA: arent all reliigiion2 ju2t lookiing for a poiint iin liife?  
AA: i  
AA: supp0se  
TA: well why are there 2o many of them?  
TA: and why ha2nt anybody found a poiint yet?  
AA: s0me pe0ple have  
TA: what?  
AA: y0u need t0 find y0ur 0wn meaning  
TA: what a wa2te.  
TA: iim 2uppo2ed to 2earch for 2omethiing that probably doe2nt even exii2t, and on top of that ii only have a liifetiime two fiind it.  
AA: precisely  
TA: uh,  
TA: ii hate two be the one two tell you thii2, but that2 kiind of depre22iing a2 fuck.  
TA: liike that iin no way make2 me feel any better about anythiing.  
TA: but thank2 ii gue22.  
AA: and im a drag t0 talk t0  
AA: s0llux what im saying is d0 what y0u l0ve  
AA: isnt there anything y0ure passi0nate ab0ut  
TA: but what2 the poiint?????  
AA: y0u arent listening  
AA: what im saying is whether 0r n0t y0u think life is meaningless and that we all live t0 die 0r whatever  
AA: y0u can still find meaning within that meaninglessness  
AA: i kn0w a thing 0r tw0 ab0ut m0rtality and the feelings that come with it trust me  
AA: i deal with that s0rt 0f thing f0r a living  
AA: s0 listen t0 me when i say that any0ne can s0mething thatll keep them g0ing even when times get t0ugh  
AA: with that being said im really s0rry to tell y0u this because theres s0 much m0re i think y0u need to hear but ive g0t t0 get back t0 w0rk  
TA: waiit.  
AA: ?  
TA: can we talk later?  
AA: im sure we will speak again  
TA: 2oon?  
AA: im n0t sure  
TA: god, youre cryptiic.  
AA: well  
AA: s0mething tells me y0u d0nt hate that ab0ut me  
TA: ii gue22.  
TA: uh  
TA: iim ju2t 2ayiing,  
TA: ju2t to, you know, put iit out there...  
TA: iif you ever wanted two meet, liike, iin per2on  
TA: or whatever  
TA: thatd be cool. iid be cool wiith that.  
TA: iif you would, ii mean.  
AA: haha  
AA: y0ure cute  
AA: i have t0 g0 n0w  
AA: bye s0llux

  
apocalypseArisen [AA] ceased trolling twinArmageddons [TA]

You curse softly under your breath and lean back in your chair, running a hand through your hair in deep thought before you sit up straight and open a new chat.

twinArmageddons [TA] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

  
TA: KK.  
CG: OH, GOD.  
CG: WHAT DO YOU WANT?  
CG: IF THIS IS ABOUT FEFERI, I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT. I AM SICK AND TIRED OF BEING FORCED BY THE DISEASE WE CALL FRIENDSHIP TO LISTEN TO YOU WHINE ABOUT YOUR GIRLFRIEND.  
CG: OH, SORRY.  
CG: I MEANT EX GIRLFRIEND.  
CG: OKAY WAIT. I ADMIT THAT ONE WAS LOW AND UNNECESSARY. I’M SORRY.  
CG: EVEN FOR ME THAT WAS BAD.  
TA: holy 2HIIT.  
TA: WOULD YOU 2HUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE?  
CG: FUCK OFF.  
CG: AND BY THAT I MEAN WHAT DO YOU WANT.  
TA: iim goiing two let your embarra22iing chiildii2h behaviior sliide ju2t thii2 once and get two the poiint.  
TA: only because iim startiing two get embarra22ed for you and ii have a 2eriiou2 que2tiion.  
CG: OK FINE.  
CG: WHAT.  
TA: have you heard of anyone named aradiia megiido?  
CG: OH, YEAH.  
CG: SURE. I USED TO KNOW HER, SHE WAS NICE ENOUGH.  
TA: ii2 2he cute?  
CG: SOLLUX WHAT THE FUCK?  
CG: WHY WOULD YOU ASK ME THAT?  
TA: what?  
TA: iit2 ju2t a que2tiion.  
CG: ARADIA MEGIDO.  
CG: THAT GIRL WHO DIED A FEW YEARS AGO.  
CG: THE ONE WHO COMMITTED SUICIDE.  
CG: JESUS CHRIST, I CAN’T BELIEVE I THOUGH YOU WOULD HAVE MORE TACT THAN TO ASK ME IF A FUCKING DEAD GIRL IS CUTE.  
TA: waiit.  
TA: dead?  
CG: YES.  
CG: DEAD AS A FUCKING DOOR NAIL.  
CG: IS THAT CLEAR ENOUGH FOR YOU? IS THAT DUMBED DOWN ENOUGH TO MAKE SENSE TO YOUR TINY, PATHETIC LITTLE BRAIN? ARE YOU ABLE TO COMPREHEND WHAT I AM SAYING TO YOU NOW?  
CG: THE POOR GIRL IS DEAD.  
CG: HER LANDLADY FOUND HER HANGING FROM THE RAFTERS A FEW YEARS BACK.  
CG: THAT’S ABOUT ALL I KNOW ABOUT IT, AND I’M NOT GOING TO BE THE ONE TO TELL YOU IF A DEAD GIRL WAS “CUTE” OR NOT.

  
twinArmageddons [TA] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

You quickly end the conversation and shut off your computer, perturbed. All of a sudden you went from feeling very confused to very confused and incredibly uncomfortable. 

Though you’re still unsettled, you decide it must have been some sort of glitch, and begin to gather your things.

As you’re turning away from your computer, you swear that, just for split second, you see a reflection that isn’t yours—one with long, curly hair and large, blank eyes—in the monitor.

You begin to walk out.

Just a glitch, you tell yourself even though you know better.

**Author's Note:**

> i keep getting ideas for fun & lighthearted fics but then i end up scrapping the idea entirely and twisting it beyond recognition into something that just ends up making me kinda sad


End file.
